I often use the word serendipity to describe sequences of events that have occurred in my life in recent years. Defined in my Google search as “the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way,” serendipity is usually regarded as a “happy chance, a happy accident or fluke, good luck, good fortune, fortuity, providence, a happy coincidence.”
I might not attach the word “happy” to my own experience of serendipity. I think of it instead as useful tools, knowledge, and the personal connections that provide them, showing up at just the right time for me. At each new turn, the perfect people and mutually aligned purposes serendipitously arrive and lend the support I require.
In 2012, during the months preceding my father’s death, client editing projects connected me with an abundance of information and training tools on the topic of end-of-life communication. These assisted me immeasurably as I had precious time to be-with my dying dad and enjoy a comfort level enriched by the preparedness this work provided as serendipitous side benefits.
Within a few weeks after his death, I began to write about the time I was with him. I used that journaling experience, telling myself the story of what happened, as a way to integrate my grief. Eventually, I published a brief memoir and began to reach out and introduce it to grief and bereavement professionals, clergy, medical personnel, and others interested in furthering end-of-life preparedness and discussions.
In that connection process, I met Victoria Brewster, MSW, now my coauthor on Journey’s End, and we realized we were serendipitously aligned to compile the many and varied perspectives that could make a valuable contribution to the field of death and dying literature. Time and again, the people who contributed to our manuscript came along at perfectly fortuitous moments in our work to add their “special sauce” to our growing array of chapters, quotes and resources.
With perfect serendipity, my work as an editor, ghostwriter and author coach continues to connect me to new client projects that inform and support my personal and family health challenges. I consider it fortuitous to have learned about grieving a sudden and traumatic loss, and about anticipatory grief, before being deeply touched by these myself. Being a best friend, family member or spouse to anyone who receives news of a sudden death, or news of a serious, life-limiting illness, is never an easy proposition. My heart breaks with such news. I am sad for the dying ones, sad for myself, and sad for all who are left behind when loved ones die.
It’s been a privilege to curate the generously shared content in Journey’s End, and doing so has given me a much broader and more intimately involved perspective on death and dying. I’m better equipped for the life and death journeys ahead, and for this I credit serendipity. I am profoundly grateful.
Namaste,
~ Julie
Image credit: Lake Simcoe Early Dawn, watercolour by Julie Levitt
Julie Saeger Nierenberg is a freelance writer and editor, lifelong educator and artist, a proud parent and "grand-partner." Julie lives in Canada. Inspired by the experience of her father’s dying and death, Julie published a short memoir about her family’s grief and loss. Daddy, this is it. Being-with My Dying Dad launched a true journey of connection and transformation, as Julie reached out to share it with those who assist the dying and bereaved. Following that memoir's publication, Julie received numerous end-of-life perspectives from others, some of which are available in Journey's End: Death, Dying and the End of Life. Writing and publishing in this heart-led direction, Julie hopes to contribute to a cultural shift in how we prepare and support others in the final chapter of life. Julie also enjoys writing and editing legacy writing, fiction and nonfiction works; she feels privileged to help other writers succeed.
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